
Shhhh. You know the deal. Therapy is in session.
So how come I can politely shush you, my readers (therapists), and in return you give me the common courtesy of reading, a share, even a comment or comeback, and my Little and Big act as if no words are ever spoken when I speak? And, while I’m at it, how come, the very same Little and Big, my shana madeleh’s (sweet little girls) can easily overhear (and respond to) everything I say to the Mrs. that is meant for the ears of only the Mrs.?
When they were wee little bubbelah’s (affectionate way to refer to someone), we would stop and literally turn the imaginary dials on each ear. Back then; I literally and figuratively had their ears!

Now, it seems our biggest battles here at the Manor, are over listening, or more importantly, not doing so! What are two mommas to do? What’s meshugenah (The crazy thing is) is they are so good! I mean really. These two are good to the core, with hearts of gold, or platinum, if that’s better? I think I finally understand why adults on all those Charlie Brown and Peanuts cartoons always spoke like this, “Whaaa whaaaa whaaaaaa, whaa whaaa whaaaaaa, whaaa whaaaaaaa.” This, this is how we sound to them? Vas is dus (what with this?).
When Little and Big are playing, and they are getting along, such a simcha (lovely, happy occasion). But when the fun and games shift and the ‘littles’ get a bit farcokt (truly, turn into a hot mess!), the geshrei’s (ear-piercing screams and shrieks) that emanate from those vocal chords, it’s a wonder the windows don’t break.

Perhaps we need another approach, the Mrs. and me? After all, we cannot scream, “Stop screaming!” and set any kind of example. If this Yiddisher momma says, Please be quiet,” and this phrase is not heard, did she ever say it? If the Mrs. gives a look, and the look isn’t seen, well, you get my point.
In the entire world, no one is more important to us than these two kinder (kids). I want more than anything for them to always feel heard, but not at the price of our eardrums and the complaints of the nextdoorikah’s and the opstairsikah’s (the neighbors). Oy, the mice, I even feel for their little ears.
Surely, some of you brave mommas and papas that have come before us have an answer? Nu?
Help us, please?
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The pictures on this post are so lovely! Piglet is also very, very good at turning up the decibels, and he is not even two yet. He has recently discovered the power of the scream, and he is not afraid to use it! #FabFridayPost
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Learning to resolve conflicts is part of growing up, and it’s a difficult part. I mean, some people don’t ever learn to peacefully resolve their conflicts, so it seems like it’s a lesson all of us have to keep learning. Perhaps if you used conflicts as a learning experience, like give each girl the name of a country, tell them about the conflicts in that country, and then let them see if they can resolve any of them. Maybe that’s too much for little kids, but you can use smaller and easier conflicts. And then using things like understanding and sharing to resolve other people’s conflicts will teach them how to do it themselves. Good luck. 🙂
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That’s beautiful! I’m a firm believer in everything being a teachable moment. We talk about news, in an age relative way. SOme things are just so unfathomable that you can’t even discuss–but either way, I like the way you think.
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Not sure if I have the answer but it may help to look for times when the girls settle an issue quietly or peacefully and make sure they know that you noticed. Great photos of them. Good luck.
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Thank you Cynthia. We had a nice talk about respect and we have been actively appreciative of good conclusions. Like just last night! Much appreciated! #FabFridayPost
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It is hard. I count to three. Then we’ll see. lol! Thank you so much Lisa for linking up with us on #FabFridayPost xx
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With Twin 1 and Twin 2 we were unbelievably blessed in that only on rare occasions did situations and tempers escalate. However, when they did we would find age appropriate ways for themm to think back and reflect on their actions we were able to really help them out. We would sometimes use their toys to act out a situation (similar to the drama which had erupted earlier!) and then we would discuss such things as…
How do you think Fluff Cat feels when Blue Ted says *insert comment linked to earlier drama*?
How could Blue Ted have asked Fluff Cat in a way that would not have upset him? Then link it back to the actual Twins situation…
Twin 1, how did you feel when Twin 2 said …. to you?
Twin 2 why did what you said hurt Twin 1’s feelings?
Twin 2, how could you ask Twin 1 for the same ting but using kind words?
Twin 1 when Twin 2 said …. to you, you said/did…. What else could you have done instead of ….and upsetting Twin 2?
What do you both need to say to each other?
We found that by giving the kids the calm time with an adult (Referee!) and providing that safe time to talk through emotions, actions, words really helped them to think about their behaviours towards each other.
It may sound a bit flouncy and some may think that its a great thing to do if you have the time but by making that time the children are given self-worth, they feel valued, respected and supported. You are allowing them to explore situations and responses which will stand them in good stead the next time they find themselves in a challenging situation.
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Wow. Thank you so much for taking the time to share that with me. We often get together and talk about the feelings, but having dolls act out is a nice touch. Brilliant!
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Me and my sister were just like this – according to my Mum! Playing nicely, screaming in the garden – she used to cringe about the neighbours. We would fall out and slam doors but we get on really well these days #stayclassy
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Same here. Wouldn’t know what to do without my big sister! ☺️
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Hahah you’re right, that IS why the children only hear adults go, “wah wah wah wah waaahhh.” Maybe it’s because we all start out life hearing that and it’s easy to fall back into? My 5 month old is definitely only hearing “wah wah wah” even though I pretend he knows exactly what I’m talking about. So, I can’t really help you….although I did read something somewhere that if you touch your child’s arm and get their attention FIRST, and then say what you are going to say, they listen more attentively. I dunno. I’m sorrryyyy, good luck! Thanks for sharing with #StayClassy!
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Thanks Meagan so much for reading and commenting. I will try the touch! It’s been a little better of late. #stayclassy
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I have no advice to give, but am working on the same puzzle so send me a note when you find the missing piece. Thanks for linking with the #FabFridayPost
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Maybe we are missing Pixie dust?
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