Posted on in #funny, Family, Human Nature, Toilet Paper, two moms, Uncategorized, Wordpress

How to set each other up for success!

Vey iz mir. (OMG.) I am in the midst of what can only be a true epic mom-fail. I need your help. You see, I believe, no matter what you are doing, how big or how small the act, you must always set up the next person for success? Nu? Is this so hard?

Let me get to the point. No matter which bathroom, loo, water closet I enter, I am often always left high and dry. You know, you rush in for a tinkle, hope that maybe, just maybe, you can pass water in peace. Alone. The door won’t fly open with a concern, a to-do needing arbitration, a question like, “What are you doing, mommy?” Just trying to pee alone, just this once. And you reach across to the toilet paper holder, usually placed convenient to the action at hand, only to find… 

All too often, this is my room with a view…

Am I the only one capable, culpable, hell-bent hung up on hanging up a new roll of toilet paper when I reach the cardboard holder which is effing recyclable people? The other day, in the course of just a few hours (I have the bladder of a flea) I was left as dry as the Sierra Desert at high noon in all three technically 2.5 of our bathrooms.

Some facts for you: We are four women. Two moms, two shana maideleh’s (sweet little girls). That’s a lot of estrogens well, it used to be more…  coursing through this home. No one leaves the seats up. No one can technically, er, um, drip dry (Gatsby, our man of the house, uses the outdoors mostly).

Not two weeks ago, I had that alone moment every parent craves and snuck into the kinder’s (kids) bathroom. I went, I turned, I reached…  NO! I stayed seated. I took a deep breath. I called for my kinder. They came joyfully running. The entered without abandon. “Hi mommy, what’ryou doing?” I asked, “What is wrong with this picture, my kinder?” They both cocked their heads, like when I ask Gatsby if he wants to go in the car or have a treat. “What do you mean, Mommy?”

I pointed to the sad scrap of paper attached to the TP holder. I said, “Have you girls ever changed the toilet paper roll before? Let me show you how, so this can stop happening to Mommy? Nu?” Since I was, well, indisposed, I asked Little to reach for a new roll. She handed it to me with her playful, almost spritely smile. I said to them both, “Watch this.” I held the new, plush roll in my lap still seated on the throne as I lifted the cardboard insert and the metal bar that holds it in place. I showed them how to emancipate remove the empty roll and did a shtick (shpiel, speech) about recycling. Then I gently placed the lovely, fresh roll onto the metal bar and lowered it into place. Thus securing the new roll, with a clean top-over pull, ready for those in need me. 

Still sitting atop said porcelain, I explained a bit about setting each other up for success in big ways, in small ways, in all ways. They nodded as if they understood. Giggling at my vulnerable state, I’m sure. Then, they scurried off to play. I completed my transaction and went about my day, thinking, “I made a difference today.” 

… Later that same day, the commode conundrum reared its ugly head yet again. This time, upstairs, in the bathroom I share with my Mrs. (and kinder too) I didn’t even try to shut the door.  I went, I reached, NO! Gatsby was curled on the mat near the shower. I looked at him and his tail wagged, making a lovely noise as it smacked the floor. He knew nothing of the tsuris (trouble) I was facing. I looked up, and across the room which felt a million miles away, atop the sink, sat a brand-new scroll. I laughed cried. I waited for eons. I stood and walked over like Elvis, with my pants around my ankles and seized my prize. Oy!

So my friends, If as a human being, living and sharing space on this precious planet we call home, you are looking to bring solace to your fellow dwellers, simply follow these easy steps.

You will need some basics.
1 new roll of (whatever ply suits your system) TP
A free hand put down the smartphone
Recycling bin (YES! It’s recyclable should not be sent to the landfill)

It’s simple really.
Remove empty roll.
Replace with new roll, paper coming over top.
Place empty roll in the recycling bin, or save for reuse as beautiful junk in a craft project with your kinder. 

Beautiful. Now watch Helen Hunt do it… you won’t be sorry for these 25 seconds, I promise.

Voila!

Anyone having these same issues? Do tell!

Yiddish Proverb:

If the Student is successful, the teacher gets the praise. Az der talmid iz a voiler, iz der rebbi oich a voiler.

     

     

      

  

63 thoughts on “How to set each other up for success!”

  2. Changing the toilet paper after you’ve used it all up is one of those small, kind actions that makes such a difference. It’s amazing how many people who don’t get that.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is my favourite thing I have read in ages, this is my life, this is me I am screaming whilst reading this!!! I just forced hubby to read and watch the clip and when my kinder get home I will show them too, we have 3 toilets shred by 3 females and 2 males and I feel like no matter which toilet I use I find this problem, and if they were somehow forced to change it I will find a pile of empty cardboard tools on the floor because it is too hard to walk to one of our 3 recycling bins!!!! I LOVE YOU! #mg

    Liked by 1 person

    1. LOVE YOU BACK! We may be spirit sisters! Oh how this drives me nuts!!!!! 😂😂😂 So Happy you shared with your family. I hope it helps! I have PTSD just feeling the urge to go! Mwah lovely Mac! #mg 😘

      Like

  6. Hah, I feel you! I don’t think my husband has ever changed the loo roll. The stack of spare toilet rolls are within reach though, so it’s not quite crisis point for us when it hasn’t been done. #KCACOLS

    Like

    1. For me, it depends which bathroom I am in… I guess some people do and some people just don’t! It should only be as bad as this, and we will all be okay! Have a lovely weekend, Christy! xoxo #KCACOLS xo

      Like

  7. I feel like I’m doing this constantly! I live in a house full of boys, I’m the only woman – and I feel like I’m the only one that changes them. AND I have to deal with toilet seats left up and little puddles on the floor. aargh!
    #fortheloveofblog

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Being the only one in the house who changes the toilet roll, drive me mad also, plus as I am the only female ( apart from the dog) I am always having to put the seat down!#fortheloveofblog@_karendennis

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am grinning ear to ear knowing I made you laugh! No tsuris (troubles) for you! That is good! Thank you for letting me know that! I will try to remember how funny it is when I get home tonight and change the next roll! Hah! xoxo

      Like

    1. Oh, I flush too. What is this about? It’s not like it’s a complicate instrument? Our smart phones are harder. You know, once that make changing the roll an app, it will get done! Officially, I purchase the rolls too. Happy Weekend Veronica! xo #FabFridayPost xoxo

      Like

  13. Oh this is a constant source of contention in our house. It seems like it is mission impossible to replace the empty loo roll. Why it is so hard I will never know! Thanks for joining us at #familyfun

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    1. Thanks Tammy! The very next morning, 2 of our bathrooms had the same thing, empty — then the bathroom at work, too! ACK! Well, this should be the worst of our worries! Have a super weekend! xoxo #familyfun

      Like

  15. I have the same problem in my house with my boys. I have managed to teach them to put the seat down, which they both always remember to do (Yay!) but the toilet paper is still an issue so I totally empathize! #globalblogging

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Toilet paper almost ended my marriage to Hubster. He kept leaving me desperate. He would even use the spare emergency roll I always keep within reach of whoever is on the toilet. I finally got even and stripped all wiping options from the bathroom while he slept. When he awoke to do his morning constitution, I laughed as he called out to me in the bed. I left him there for a half an hour and went to eat my breakfast – walking directly passed him as he called me. He’s never done it to me again and our marriage was saved! He even puts the paper on the roll with it coming off the top, the only proper way to do it! #GlobalBlogging

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Pingback: #GlobalBlogging linky week 51… | Shank You Very Much

  24. Pingback: Global Blogging #51 - One Messy Mama

  28. #thesatsesh the issue is real! feeling ya, i live with boys – so i feel like this is 100 times worse… we are blessed to have 2 bathrooms and I’m the only human able to replace as i go. We save our empty toilet rolls and i sell them 🙂 people will buy anything.

    Liked by 1 person

  29. This happens in our house all. the. time. I am sure I am the only one who ever replaces the loo roll! Aaaargh! A worthy BlogCrush nomination, Lisa. Congrats 🙂 #blogcrush

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Hehe just popping back again because someone loved this post so much, they added it to the BlogCrush linky! Feel free to collect your “I’ve been featured” blog badge 🙂 #blogcrush

    Liked by 1 person

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