Popular Yiddish Phrases that apply to Mr. Orange Elect

No mom, I don't think we should read the news anymore. You get too upset...
No mom, I don’t think we should read the news anymore. You get too upset…

We the people, of these disenfranchised and divided states of America, lay uncomfortably in wait for the passing of the baton from President Obama to Mr. Orange-elect ( I will not say his name). In thinking of positive ways to come to grips with this most unfortunate outcome, I am seeking solace in my inner ‘glass half-full’ / Mary Poppins approach to life. Please allow me to share with you, some very popular Yiddisheh phrases that coincide with the strangest turn of events in political history, and my lifetime. We’ll turn this into an opportunity to learn some Yiddish!

  • He that cannot obey cannot command. Er az kenen nit folgn kenen nisht bafel. We are clearly not in Kansas anymore. No disclosure of tax returns. Cancelled announcement of how he plans to divest his global businesses and their inherent flow of green. What ‘conflicts of interest?’ Chats with Vlad, and the Prez of Taiwan, like there is such a thing. Oy gevalt (geeze louise!)! 
  • If we all pulled in one direction, the world would keel over. Ayob mir ale puld in eyn riktung, di velt volt kil iber. White supremacy. Muslim registry. Women. LGBT. Disabled. Jews. Latino’s. Kaynahorah (a saying to ward off the evil eye), may he be all talk, because this is sounding all too familiar my friends. 
  • A chip on the shoulder indicates wood higher up. A shpon aoyf di axl indekeyts holts hekher aroyf. Daily security briefings? So last term. He’s smart, so smart, that this is a waste of time. He needs a security briefing like he needs a loch en kop (hole in the head). Oh, but he does need time to continue to produce the Celebrity Apprentice
  • Don’t approach a goat from the front, a horse from the back, or a fool from any side. Du zalst nisht tsugang a tsig fun di front, a ferd fun di tsurik, oder a nar fun keyn zayt. Congratulations to those of you who hired this man.
  • When you grease palms, you ride. Ven ir shmirn palms, ir for. The US intelligence community has come out in force, before, during and after the election results, to let the American people know that Mr. O’s bro, Vlad has absolutely, positively, and undeniably, hacked our democracy to sway the election in favor of the unfavorable. Nu? (So?) They played us like a violin.  Mr. O, he says this is ridiculous, it’s all a bubbeh meisah (an old wives tale). Hacking, shmacking…
  • Not everyone who sits in the seat of honor is master. Nit alemen vas zitst in di avekzetsn fun kvud iz bel.  The electoral college needs to officially vote to make Mr. O-elect the president. And, go-no, before the vote, they are asking to be ‘briefed’ further on this hacking business from the same US Intel community that Mr. O is snubbing. Hmmmm…
  • Surrounding yourself with dwarfs does not make you a giant. Arumik zikh mit dvarfs tut nisht makhn ir a riz. Look who plays in his sandbox? Vlad, Sarah (did she see this all this spying and hacking from her house?), Bannon, Tex-Rex, David Duke, Jim Crow? Gutinue? (OMG!) 
  • He who praises himself will be humiliated. Er vas shilus zikh vet zayn khiumileyitid. Billy Bush. That’s all I need to say here.  
  • You are smart, smart, smart – but you are not so smart. Klieg, Klieg, Klieg-Du bist a nar. Yup. Yuppers.
  • L’Chiam! To life! Because we must end on a positive note. And that’s a wrap for today. 



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POTUS, Shmotus, I’m Embarrassed

They deserve so many freedoms -- family equality among them
They deserve so many freedoms — family equality among them

This morning, I am typing as an exceedingly mortified, angry American. Not but five hours ago, did I sit with the Mrs. and witness one of the worst, most vitriolic attempts, at a town hall style presidential debate for the highest level of office in our country. Bizarre doesn’t begin to cover what continues to unwind before our very eyes.

As I write, I hear the same early morning noises. The family above me stirs about in their apartment. Streetcars blur by. A siren blares in the distance. The birds chirp as they plot and plan the day. A distant, “I love you” is heard across the parking lot as the waste truck winds it way through the route. Everything sounds the same, yet nothing is the same.

Our world changed last night. Not for the better. This election is a nightmare. We have lowered the bar in this country in a way that reality TV has trained the proverbial ‘us’ to accept. Whoever is elected in this next election will shape so much more than the next four years of our lives. They will hold the power to define the next generations to come. My kinder (children), your kinder, and our kinder’s kinder too.

My vote is not a vote of hate or divisiveness. I am voting because #BlackLivesMatter. I am voting against #Islamophobia. I am voting for religious freedoms. I am voting for #WomensRights, #LatinoRights, #LGBTrights, #MarriageEquality, #DisabilitiesMatter. My vote is for closing the loopholes on guns and creating better background checks. I am voting for health care that rightfully includes mental health. These are just words folks; words drenched in meaning, not empty rhetoric. Words attached to people and lives that matter.

What did I learn last night?

  1. A mentshn derkent men in zayn redn. (A person is recognized by his speech.)
  1. A kluger vaist vos er zogt; a nar zogt vos er vaist. (A wise man knows what he says; a fool says what he knows.)
  1. Vi ainer iz tsu ziben, azoi iz er tsu zibetsik. (As one is at seven, so is he at seventy.)

Maya Angelou said it best when she said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”

He has shown us time and time again. Say NO to the bully.





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